sometimes all the weight of all of the hurt seems so stifling and overwhelming. this stuff is only supposed to come in seasons, right? why does it feel as if suffering just does not stop? broken people. dark struggles. unexpected loss over and over and over again. love is breaking my heart. but maybe it's not about me and my heart. maybe it's not about how suffering affects me and how the hurt overwhelms me at the most unwelcomed times: at work, at home, at church, alone, in a group. maybe it's how Philippians 3 puts it "Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord...that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith - that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share in his sufferings becoming like him in his death ..." ...